I don’t write a lot of personal blog posts, my life really isn’t that interesting unless you want to hear about how I live in my car playing kiddie chauffeur driving one kid to this Doctors appointment, then taking the other to his Doctors appointment, battling teen daughter drama while stopping somewhere in between to photograph my GORGEOUS clients. It’s pretty basic, thats why I love it.

But now I’m a mom, a photographer, a business owner, a million in one other things and a soon to be Bride. I’ve been engaged since October of last year; I’ve had eight-five percent of my wedding planned within the first 8 weeks of being engaged. I mean wedding photographer, hello! Clearly, I know a thing or two? Maybe, kinda….not so much?

I know the logistics, I know the best venues (most outside my art school degree budget), the amazing DJ (hey Wayne!) as well as many other talented vendors. I found my photographer really fast and with great luck (Joanne, she’s awesome!) and even got our Engagement photos done stat!

I was on a roll, I had this down. It wasn’t going to be overly stressful, Patrick gave me his input and together we made decisions. No wishy washy.

Now I’m sitting here 6 months away from the date and the emotions have caught up to me. I’m starting to actually feel like a BRIDE. Not a party planner. An emotional, sappy, bride. I’ve also starting to re-evaluate what is important to me as a bride, even more what is important to Patrick and I as a couple. Which aspects of the wedding industry are going to be part of our memories, if any?

First off our children, without them we wouldn’t be who we are. We have my son Nicholas from my first marriage (when I was 18 and clearly not thinking straight, but I got Nicholas so it was all worth it!), my adopted daughter Cecilia and our foster son Francisco. Those three children are our lives, we live for them, we do it all for them.

We want to adopt our foster son, that would be a nice touch on completing the current portrait of our family. Making his place permanent. This has recently become possible, but we are not yet married. So we could wait, wait for the planned wedding in October, but what about this child? He has to be in limbo for how much longer? No. We just cannot do that to him.

So wedding change No. 1 – We run off to Vegas

No seriously, we are running off to vegas; in four weeks I might add.

As sound as I thought my previous wedding planing decisions were, I am more sure that this is the best decision Patrick and I have ever made. We talked about just going to the courthouse and signing some papers, but thats really not our style. Patrick loves the idea of Vegas and getting married in some cheesy ceremony officiated by Elvis of course. So thats what it will be.

We fly off on the 10th, get married the 11th and return home the wee hours of the 13th husband and wife. We are doing it fast and mostly unannounced just to make one little boy not have to wait for his permanent family any longer. Then its adoption paperwork time!

Doing all these last minute preparations for this Vegas craziness made both Patrick and I realize: we are not party people. The solitude of getting married, in a city far away, all by ourselves is amazing! We are just not large crowd, get crazy and dance in front of everyone we know people. We like the intimacy of just being with each other, its nice.

So wedding change No. 2 – We are canceling our Reception

Really we are. We are already running off to Vegas, then in October we are having our romantic woodsy wedding at the Thorncrown Chapel. Thats enough for us. Our October wedding, the one we’ve been planning has very few people there, less then 10 in total. The best part though, we will have all of our children there and they will all legally be OUR children.

We will say our vows and be committed together once more, but even more, we will be committed together as a family. That really is the best part and just typing this makes me a bit teary eyed.

Maybe at some point we will celebrate with extended family and friends, but for right now there is no formality to it and we like that.

So six months ago, at the start of this wedding planning journey I thought I knew it all. I got wrapped up into the hype of being a bride, but not feeling like a bride. I’ve been a wedding photographer for a very long time and I have seen weddings of all shapes and sizes, but it isn’t the giant parties or the elaborate lighting that makes a wedding amazing, its the couple committing to each other. Thats all that matters.

We all go about our special day different. Patrick and I are choosing to elope, twice. Its offbeat, but thats fine. Make your wedding your own, don’t let the hype or others make you feel like you need to do something that really isn’t you. Just because its called a tradition doesn’t mean you cannot break that tradition. Just do you (and if thats a big party go for it!).

I love nothing more then seeing a happy bride and groom, who know that the day they planned for each other is exactly what they wanted and not anyone else. I’m happy I was able to do the same for myself. I love Patrick, he is my light and our wedding(s) are going to be a great memory to start the rest of this journey.

….Stay tuned for the Vegas story…